So the inevitable life cycle of The Blog caught up with me: you spend the first few days fascinated with yourself, writing all the time. “The world now knows what I think about it all,” you say to yourself, keeping them updated on your most recent bowel movements and the like. Then after a week you decide to look up how many people have viewed your page since its inception and realize no one gives a shit what you have to say. That’s when the indifference sets in and, typically, you suddenly find yourself without anything worth writing about.

It happened to me, sad to say. For the last week I have either been rotting at work, driving home, or lying awake desperately trying to cling to the denial that I have to do it all again tomorrow.

Yesterday I listened to two of my comically obese coworkers debate the merits of using a broadsword instead of a longsword when they LARP. Part of me died inside while another part was born, laughing and cooing while they played peek-a-boo with me, briefly flashing their desperate and pathetic lives before hiding them behind the cellphones they were testing.

I realized at that moment that this job is a perfect source of content for this website. What other part of my life forces me to reflect on all that is wrong in the world for 8 hours a day!?

So this is me saying, I’m not going away. Things you can expect in the near future, dear readers:

  • Video evidence of my failed career as a child actor
  • The tale of my first horrible day as a full-time cog in the machine
  • Snide laughter at all the people who voted for Obama not realizing he’s a politician just like the rest of them.
  • Thoughts and stuff